?????????????????????????????????

I am shocked by what I found on Adoptive Family Cirlce forum.  I am not shocked at the decline in the number of international adoptions.  I am very aware of this.  Continue reading what this author has to say about the decline. Here is the link to where I found this.  http://www.adoptivefamiliescircle.com/forums/viewthread/351/
Here is what it said:
According to the Detroit News, international adoption fell 13 percent in 2010. The AP reports 2010’s total number of international adoptions came in at 11,059, down from 12,753 in 2009 and down more than 50 percent from the all-time high in 2004 of 22,884. One factor? A virtual standstill of adoptions from Guatemala, due to corruption issues, many news sources say. One blogger at Slate.com thinks this drop is a mixed blessing for the adoption community, a sign that:
... the United States government has increased its efforts to end baby- and child-trafficking in countries that send large numbers of children to the U.S. for adoption, and those increased efforts mean both fewer corrupt adoptions, and fewer adoptions overall ... Falling numbers and longer waiting times probably look bleak to parents hoping to adopt internationally, but every adoptive parent should welcome the changes that led to the drop—and, perversely, hope for even lower numbers in years to come.
What do you think about the news? If you’re considering adoption, has it made you think twice about international adoption? If you’re in the midst of an international adoption, how does it make you feel?

I will tell you what I think:  I am outraged that a person would say this: every adoptive parent should welcome the changes that led to the drop—and, perversely, hope for even lower numbers in years to come. Are you kidding me?  Who will take care of the orphans that are left behind?  I want to see ethical adoptions and laws to stop the corruption, but laws should protect the children not imprison them in a system that is broken.  Why should children  suffer the consequences for adults mistakes. In all other areas of social justice we condemn the abuser, for some reason when it comes to adoption we condemn the innocent children.  Being apart of a failed adoption makes this post even more disturbing.  I have felt the pain of the wait and the loss.  Stopping international adoption is not going to make the orphan problem go away.  The person who wrote this post ought to stop and consider if he would feel the same way if he was an orphan all alone with no one that cared about him. 

Where are we at in our new adoption path?

Aug. 6th 2010, we got the call that the DOS had suspended adoptions from Nepal.  We had spent 20 months apart of this program and it all came to a crashing halt.  We didn't see it coming.  Things were finally moving with the Nepal government.  Referrals and travel approval were being issued.  We thought things might be finally getting into some kind of routine.  The DOS had given warnings, but I always thought it was warnings about the Nepal government.  I didn't realize they were warning us about our own government.  80 families with referrals were allowed to continue.  Last I heard 56 families are still waiting for their visa so they can bring their child home. Some have been in Nepal since August! 
On Oct. 8, my mother-in-law passed away after battling cancer.  She died very quickly and thankfully with little pain.  We were in no position to make a decision on what we should do next when it came to adoption.  As time has passed we have researched special needs and risks of countries and now with a better understanding on how other agencies work, we have changed agencies and our homestudy is being updated to China's requirements and should be ready in a couple of weeks.
Paper chase is a funny thing.  You think I would be use to it by now, but you find yourself so ready to sit down and tackle it yet you are at the mercy of other people.  I could sit down and in a matter of days, weeks get the forms filled out.  Problem is that you have to wait for other people along the way.  So you hurry and fill out forms and then you wait.  You get that back and then you can work on the next step.  You hurry up with the forms and then you wait.  It goes on like this for months. I am not a very organized person.  I work great under pressure.  So even though I could be getting some forms done, I just don't have the motivation to do them when there seems to be no point to it since I don't have back what I need.  Really?  Can I really do this paper chase again? 
I follow several blogs of families that were also apart of the Nepal program. Most of them have made a decision about what to do next.  Some of them have experienced even more adoption failures.  They understand how I feel right now. When you have a failed adoption you don't look at the next adoption the same way.  The first time you are all excited and want to meet other families that are in your agency, in the same program.  You talk about being paper pregnant and find the jewelry that says this or has a picture of the country you are adopting from.  I really don't know how to feel right now.
So here I wait.....waiting for the call that my adoption agency has received my homestudy and made corrections and then wait for my homestudy agency to make the corrections that our adoption agency ask for and then....Our homestudy will be done! and I will hurry up again :).......and wait........

My hope for this blog....

We recently experienced a failed international adoption.  It was heart breaking.  I longed for a gathering place where others who had gone through the same thing could meet and share their experiences.  I will share where we are at on our journey to bring our daughter home from China, but I also will be taking the time to look at the crisis that international adoption is experiencing right now.  I know there will be people who will disagree with me.  There are many families who have had wonderful experiences adopting and have no idea the heart break that is going on.  I see many families that feel more families should rise up to adopt.  This is true, but more than money is stopping people right now.  There are many countries that are a huge risk to adopt from.  Three countries in the last few years have been shut down by our government.  bothendsburning.org  is an organization that is fighting to save international adoption.  They want to help change the laws so that more children can find their forever families.  Too many families are having to wait years for a referral or years after a referral to bring their children home.  These children spend far too long in the orphanages before they are finally united with their family.  In our case we will never meet our Nepali princess.  It breaks my heart that so many children were left behind.  It is time for a change!  I hope that this will be a place that we can unit and comfort each other on our journeys.